I’d Leave If I Knew Where To Go.

A lot of times I hear people say, “Go back to where you came from.” Believe us, we would if we could. Does no one understand that? I would go somewhere, anywhere, I would leave this place, but my people and I literally have nowhere to go and we are unable to fathom where we could go, thanks to the trans-atlantic slave trade.

Do you think that we want to stay in a country that hates us? That deems our lives as so trivial, that they can annihilate our bodies and souls at any moment? Do you think we like being hated, taunted, oppressed, profiled, ripped down, stomped on, and stolen from?

We. Don’t. Enjoy. Those. Things.

Honestly, it’s a miracle that more black people don’t have severe psychological issues because we deal with everything from subconscious hate to blatant and overt discrimination. It sucks, but I just want people to know that if we could leave we would.

It’s absolutely life shattering to stay in a place where you’re 100% sure that there are some people in this country who just blatantly don’t care about your existent. No sense of human compassion, no empathy, nothing at all. It’s hard to live in a place that you know doesn’t care about you, but we have become numb to it.

So, instead of wallowing in self pity about how the world is against us, because it is in some cases, I try to remember all the people that would kill to see me fall. I try to remember that me doing amazing things is the least they expect of me. They expect me to be a statistic. A college dropout, a young mother, and to go on and recreate a broken family, which is the obvious issue, says Rudy Giuliani. I remind myself that I should be doing so well that the people who are too ignorant to acknowledge race as a part of the society we live in, think that I, “transcend race.” That they think I’m their African-American friend they can show off and say, “Well, she’s not really black.” Even though my blackness is as black as the soil my ancestors dug into to create this beautifully, twisted, confused and advanced country, we call the United States. That we call home.

I also remember the support that I have from friends, family, allies and the rest of the black community. It is tough and it is hard, but the best thing we can do is remember the support we have that is driving us to be the very best we are able to be. We can do so much more when we are driven, motivated and hopeful.

Alas, in the wise words of the arrogant, self-righteous and unapologetic Kanye West:

“Now I could let these dream killers kill my self-esteem, or use the arrogance as the steam to power my dreams.”

So that is exactly what I’ll do, and you all should also.

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